Containing 1,001 conversation starters from one of our most cherished comedians, along with plenty of answers from the many household names who've appeared on his podcast, this book is virtually guaranteed to remove any social anxiety from your life, and will raise your repartee-game to new heights. And if so, would you risk tasting his briny essence to confirm his identity or would you prefer to remain a cucumber coward?

After you have been anally violated by the chocolate bar, who would you like to then eat the chocolate bar, not knowing where it had been, whilst you secretly watch them? Which celebrity do you think is the most likely to have a collection of the severed fingers of his or her victims made into a bizarre necklace that he or she wears when they’re away from the spotlight? When I did a marathon rewatch of the whole of This Life – you can find highlights from my observations on that here – I intentionally omitted This Life + 10 as I hate it that much.

Would you rather have a time machine that can only take you back to the 1973 wedding of Prince Anne and Mark Phillips or an invisibility cloak that glitches randomly at least once a minute, making you totally visible for a couple of second? What do you think of the decision made by Jeffrey Katzenberg of Disney Studios to cut the song When Love is Gone from the theatrical release of A Muppet Christmas Carol ? Either it’s something unhealthy about our national reverence towards beer culture or our national deference to anyone in any old badly fitting suit that claims to have all the answers, and it’s hard to know which is the bigger issue here.

Artificial Intelligence: If the world were to be populated entirely by Richard Herring look-alikes – which it almost is – would it be a utopia of Herring-based hilarity, or a nightmarish dystopia where the same jokes are repeated ad infinitum ? Morrissey, as you can find out here, is the primary reason why I never really find myself wanting to listen to The Smiths as much any more. I went to that gig with someone who I’d literally only just watched my off-air of the Channel 4 broadcast of Absolute Beginners from (I think) 1991 with, so it was all quite the moment for several reasons.There will be some slightly fonder memories of Record Breakers shortly in case you were about to start complaining that I was ruining your childhood, but in the meantime, further concern was expressed about Norris when Joanne Sheppard talked about The Guinness Book Of Pet Records on Looks Unfamiliar here. What is the most selfish thing you’ve ever prayed for and what do you think God made of your self-centered request? If you could be king of any genus of living creatures and have them do your bidding, which animal or creature or type of human – could be anything – would you have do your bidding? Despite presumably only being broadcast once, the song seems to have indelibly imprinted itself onto the memory of anyone who saw it.

The chromatic harmonica, because it’s bastard difficult and I’d love to be able to play Rhapsody In Blue. And I even rewatched Inhumans when I did a Marvel Cinematic Universe rewatch, and if you’ve heard this then you’ll know just how much I thought of that. To my absolute bewilderment, this Emergency Question was immediately set upon by ‘Didn’t Happen’-type characters, who started demanding ‘proof’ of it – sorry, I should have thought ahead that I might need to preserve documentary evidence of something I didn’t even realise was happening in about 1988 or something – and some of them started pulling out diagrams of azimuth paths or something in a bid to discredit a silly and entertaining anecdote. If I could understand why I find them so hysterical, then frankly I’d understand a lot more about myself.Perhaps if Michael Parkinson had asked Mohammad Ali if he'd ever seen a Bigfoot he might be remembered as a great interviewer. Over and above anyone else, Boris Johnson for that ‘best way to honour Jo Cox is deliver Brexit’ remark. Why did Itsu in Notting Hill change from a sit-down sushi restaurant, with all the stuff going around on the conveyor belt, to just selling stuff out of fridges? If you didn’t have to have sex with Zippy, Bungle, George, Geoffrey, or Rod, but not Jane or Freddy, who would now be asleep, but they said they were up for it if you fancied it, but not an orgy situation, it would have to be one-on-one, would you have sex with one of them, and which one?

Medieval pretenders to the throne Perkin Warbeck and Lambert Simnel, whom I have always found unaccountably amusing. Would you rather date a woman who was a 6-foot tall vulva, or a woman who instead of having a vagina had another tiny woman in her place? One of the most dynamic and successful commercial imprints in the UK, Sphere aims to publish the highest-quality popular fiction and non-fiction, including thrillers, women's fiction, and celebrity titles. Would you rather be the most famous and successful person of all time, but only after you’ve died, or get 2-for-1 meals at Harvester for the rest of your life?Would you rather be imprisoned for a murder that you didn’t commit or for a murder that you did commit? If you could make one part of your body or one of your senses fifty times more sensitive than it currently is, which body part or sense would get a fifty times increase in sensitivity?